“CHURCH CAR PARK – FOR MEMBERS ONLY. TRESPASSERS WILL BE BAPTISED!”
That took care of the problem!
Below are various church signs and notices that show the divine message can be conveyed through humour.
- No God – No Peace? Know God – Know Peace.
- Free trip to heaven. Details inside!
- Searching for a new look? Have your faith lifted here!
- An advertisement for one church has a picture of two hands holding stone tablets on which the Ten Commandments are inscribed and a headline that reads: “For fast, fast, fast relief, take two tablets.”
- “When the restaurant next to a church put out a sign with big red letters that said, “Open Sundays”, the church reciprocated with its own message: “We are open on Sundays, too.”
- People are like tea bags – you have to put them in hot water before you know how strong they are.
- Fight truth decay - study the Bible daily.
- How will you spend eternity – Smoking or Non-smoking?
- Dusty Bibles lead to dirty lives.
- Come work for the Lord. The work is hard, the hours are long and the pay is low. But the retirement benefits are out of this world.
- It is unlikely there will be a reduction in the wages of sin.
- Do not wait for the hearse to take you to church.
- If you’re headed in the wrong direction, God allows U-turns.
- If you don’t like the way you were born, try being born again.
- Looking at the way some people live, they ought to obtain eternal fire insurance soon.
- “This is a ch _ _ ch. What is missing?” ... U R
- In the dark? Follow the Son.
- Running low on faith? Step in for a fill-up.
- If you can’t sleep, don’t count sheep. Talk to the Shepherd.